THE INSPECTION
By: Jeffrey Strueby

Edited By:
Haley Melhorn
Andrew Soktowy
Terry Strubey

I am a health inspector for restaurants in Italy. One day I was walking upstairs to my apartment to check my list for what restaurant was next for me to inspect. When I got to my door, I heard a loud rumbling noise coming from the other side of it. I wondered if it was a burglar or a serial killer or a scary person! Or what if it’s a CRAZY GUY! I was scared. “Think happy thoughts” I told myself. “I know”, I said to myself , “It’s Santa Claus! Or it’s the tooth fairy!” I opened the door and sure enough it wasn’t either of those things. “No Santa?” I said feeling a little depressed. I looked for my list, but I couldn’t find it. I looked everywhere. I realized the window was open and a ladder to the café downstairs was there. I thought I can still catch the crook! In a panic, I ran down the stairs when I ran down the stairs I tripped down the rest of the stairs into the café. I found Bonkey panting hard, holding my list. I asked, “How did you get that list?” He replied nervously “A crook just ran by with it in his hands”. I asked him “But then why are you panting?” “I snatched it from him” he said. “WELL why are you panting?” I asked again. He replied “I just took out the garbage and I had to hold my breath.” “Oh” I said, “Well, can I have my sheet ba…” “NO!” he said. “I mean not yet. I should bring it to the cops to see if they can bag the crooks that tried to steal it. Someone that dangerous shouldn’t be on the streets” he added. I said “Okay but I need to check whose restaurant I need to inspect first.” I snatched the sheet and said “Wow! Lucky you! I’m inspecting your café, Bonkey!” He replied “Yeah, wow, lucky me.” I said “You take the sheet to the police station on your break because I need to get some groceries and I don’t inspect you until 1:00.” After I got my groceries, I went into my apartment, sat on the couch and watched TV. On the news I saw the news reporter talking about Phony products and how bad they are. Some of the product names were the Phony Phone, the Phony Fork, the Phony fan and last but not least Phony food. I looked at my watch; it was 12:50. I turned off the TV and locked the door. I waited downstairs in the café. I looked at my watch; 1:00. Bonkey came out of the kitchen with one of each thing on the menu. “Dig in” he said. An hour later I said “Okay now all you have to do is show me the kitchen.” “What?” he said. “YOU HAVE TO SHOW ME THE WHERE YOU COOK THE FOOD!” I said. “I don’t think that’s a good idea” he protested. I said “If you don’t, you fail the inspection.” I pushed through the door and BARFED. He had barrels of Phony food. An hour later, the DFBS (Dangerous Food Bomb Squad) came in and destroyed the horrible waste, Bonkey was fired and The café was changed into a pizza place.



The End